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I never understood my anxiety and depression in my younger years. I think I was constantly trying to suppress it with substances. Always putting on that brave game face and trying to tackle everything. I will be honest not much has changed. I am more self aware about it and am seeking help. I don’t expect this to ever go away, I know how to pick and choose my battles. This is one that I will be fighting forever. But because I share my story, I have a whole army supporting me.

Sometimes depression will take you to very dark places..if you let it. Being mindful, letting myself know it’s ok, not to be ok. I try to be kind to everyone, most importantly myself. Pet my cats, take a few whiffs of essential oils, make a tea, go for a walk, smoke a joint, take a pill, speak to someone I trust.

Whatever I have to do to bring myself back, back to right now. Breathe. That breath is everything. Be grateful for that.